We at "Pimpin 4 Jesus!" believe that if the cross was an Escalade, Jesus would have had 24" rims on that shit, yo!





-That a thong is a practice of humility





-That being able to find jerusalem on a map is secondary to practicin' my flow





-That learning the english language is secondary to practicin' my flow





-That finding my way out of a box is secondary to practicin' my flow (why ya'all be hate'n?)





-That you need to be blingin' to get past St Peter.





-WWJB! (what would jesus bomb)





-It's merely a strange coincidence that were it is hardest to buy birth-control it is easiest to buy a gun





-That even though I've eaten a seedless watermelon, darwin is a lying fag.





-That even though I'm wasting my youth, my money, my mind, my morality and the lives of anyone who depends on me all in one equally vain and ignorant attempt to become the Illest Playa or the Slickest Hoe (and my mind will explode if i ever seriously considered how the hedgemony behind it happend) , Jesus is going to make everything all right.