Group URL: http://groups.myspace.com/cubirthparents

GUIDELINES FOR THIS GROUP:

Show respect and courtesy to others

We all have some level of hurt, grief and shame. We are each dealing with it in the way that we can. Please let this be a place of support and camraderie - and not a place of condemnation or accusation. Mutual respect and support is undermined by judgment. This means giving one another the courtesy of the benefit of the doubt at times, and accepting ambiguity or errors in grammar, facts or language at face value. Unlike an in-person support group, where we have not only our words but our body language, voice, and facial expressions to supplement our meaning, in this forum there are only words. It is easy to misinterpret, so you must make a conscious effort not to find unintended meaning in what others say.

Do not engage in personal attacks
Do not make comments that denigrate, invalidate, or intimidate others. Let this be an environment free from harassment. If you disagree with someone, feel free to say so, but please refrain from putting others in a position where they must vigorously defend their opinion or feelings. Please do not attack another's judgment, choices, or feelings. When an opinion is challenged, it is not a personal attack, but an opportunity for that opinion to either be strengthened or weakened by the discussion that follows.

Do not retaliate
If someone posts something you find hurtful or offensive, it is not your duty to publicly flog or reprimand the offender. It is your duty to file a complaint by contacting the moderator of this group. Please trust the group moderation process and do not take it upon yourself to strike back publicly on the list.

Speak only for yourself
No one can or should speak for another here. Each of us is an expert on our own experience. There is no contest to see who hurt the most, as truly no one can win that contest.

What is said here stays here
Do not forward, publish, or reproduce any post from the thread list without the author's permission. Do not publish any private conversation to the list without the other party's permission.

I would also remind members that this is a public forum. Act like you would act in public. Be mindful that your messages can be read by anyone who joins the group. Imagine you are stepping up to speak in front of a microphone with hundreds of people listening and act accordingly.

Follow the moderator's instructions
From time to time, the moderator may step in and request that conversations be taken off the list and continued in private. Or the moderator may suggest that a thread has run its course and request that it be concluded. Please follow the moderator's instructions.


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